We writers can be closed off and private or very prone to over-sharing. And as with conversations over dinner, so go query letters and cover letters. When you submit your writing, you want to be sure you’re not sharing TMI (too much information). Here are a few things you should consider leaving out of your letters.
Age at which you started writing. If you’re making submissions, it’s pretty much a given that at some point in your life, you began to love writing. Maybe you were five and maybe you were fifty. Unless there’s an especially compelling (book-related) reason to mention when or why you fell for writing, best to leave it out.
Number of places the work has already been rejected. If you were walking into a bar and everyone who was leaving stopped to tell you how lame it was inside, would you pay the cover charge? Probably not.
Reason you don’t think the work will be picked up. There’s no reason to point out any reasons that you feel your writing may be weak. If it is weak, facts will speak for themselves.
Ghostwriters and editors. You might not want to mention right off the bat that you’ve had your writing professionally edited. You might mention a writing coach or teacher, but generally, leave line editors out. Why? Because a literary agent or poetry editor wants to offer a contract to you, not your freelance editor. That said, we do believe that honesty is the best policy. And so before you sign a contract at a literary agency, be sure your agent knows you worked with an editor.
How much money you expect/want to make. A query or cover letter is not the place to talk about payment, advances, or rights (like movie deals). Have that discussion once you’re further along in the process. Read more: How Much Money Can I Make Writing Poems, Short Stories, Novels, Essays, And Nonfiction Books?
When you had your last eye exam. Unless your medical condition is relevant to your writing, it may not be appropriate to mention any mental or physical health issues in your letter.
How many of your friends and family members like your writing. Praise from blood relations, in-laws, friends, professors, and writing groups doesn’t count when you’re gunning for the big leagues. Include only professional reviews or quotes from established writers.
Personal manifestos. You certainly can (and should) have a personal manifesto (or two). But your letter is not the place to mention it unless it ties directly into your writing.
Query Letter TMI
Self-published books that didn’t sell. Some self-published books may be worth mentioning in your bio. But others are best left out. See our article: When (Not) To Include Your Self-Published Book In Your Query Letter.
Negative situations with other publishing professionals. Maybe you used to have an agent who was a slimeball. But mentioning that negative relationship in a query letter is like wearing a pin to singles night that says “Ask me about my divorce.” Sometimes, it’s necessary to bring up bad things in a query; the key is doing so with care. You do want to be clear about a project’s history, especially if you’ve already “shopped it around” to editors. But you can allude to your situation without bombarding an agent with details. If you get a nibble, then you can mention any negatives from the past. Learn more: Warning Signs: How To Spot A Bad Literary Agent: Part One.
This is my [first/second/thirtieth manuscript]. While feeling proud of your accomplishments is good, literary agents will likely read that you’ve written thirty books and wonder why none of them have been published. And if it’s your first or second manuscript, that may not be something to call attention to either. Just play it cool by not mentioning how many manuscripts are under your bed.
This is the first of a completed, fifteen-book series. If you’ve written fifteen books in a series but you haven’t sold the first one, you may be in for trouble. Better to focus on one book at a time. Learn more: Mentioning Multiple Books In A Query Letter.
The Moral Of The Story For Your Letters
Writing a query or cover letter is like going on a job interview: you don’t want to give too much or too little information. Always speak to your strengths, not your weaknesses. Common sense and a bit of precaution will go a long way!
Writing your own query letter may seem daunting, but the experts at Writer’s Relief can help! For our Full Service clients, our professional letter writing team creates effective query letters that are skillfully crafted to entice literary agents and build interest in their books. If you’re a DIY-type, you’ll find an easy-to-follow, step-by-step blueprint for writing a successful query letter using proven marketing techniques in our book, The Ultimate Query Letter Tool Kit by Writer’s Relief.
QUESTION: Write a sentence that you believe should NOT appear in a query letter. Feel free to be silly!
Using the phrase “fiction novel.” If it’s a novel, it’s fiction. I see this all the time.
Dear Agent,
Please consider my blah blah blah…etc.
And by the way, I know where you live.
Sincerely,
Writer
Dear Agent,
Please consider my 90,000 word memoir about how I drove my last agent crazy. I’m planning on writing a sequel…
Sincerely,
Future Client
Hey there Agent person,
My bff wuz reeding this and said, wtf, u shud like send this to sumbody and I saw yer name in a faceook ad so here it is lol and I need the 1st check reel soon so I can ditch this pos laptop for an ipad.
later
sleepy cat face, lol,
I researched your name in several agent lists, found no well selling titles associated with it, so I thought I’d submit my novel to you to help you break out of that rut.
My family tree eerily resembles that of the Baggins and Took families, so I just know you’ll love my prequel to J.R.R. Tolkien’s book, “The Hobbit”; I also have a sequel to his trilogy, “The Lord of the Rings”, in the works in case you need to know that I am more than a one-book gal.
Dear Literary Agent,
I figured it was time to submit my 200 page manuscript to you because my mother read it and said it was wonderful, and my dog wags his tail every time I sit down at the computer to write something.
To: Mary Smith
Acme Literary Agency
Dear Sir,
My ten year old daughter loved it.
Dear Agent,
I have shared this manuscript with several people whose reaction has been mixed; HOWEVER, my Border collies [smartest dogs in the world] have been unstinting in their praise. The puppy has already eaten at least a quarter of it. Fortunately the original is safely stored in my computer.
Dear Sir:
I know you said no poetry, but isn’t a novel just a long poem?
I understand that you are looking for poetry only. My novel is a form of poetry, only longer.
Dear slimeball…
Dear Sir;
It was a dark and stormy night when I finished this manuscript.
It was a bright, sunny morning when I sent it to you.
It will be a glorious, blessed day when you accept it.
It will be a depressing, dreary day if you reject it.
Sincerely,
The Weatherman
Dear Agent,
If you don’t LOVE my novel, you’re an idiot and should consider another line of work, like culling sled dogs. If you like it you’re a genius, which is good because culling is a disgusting practice and should be outlawed as I’m sure you’ll agree. Now-about my novel- It’s a memoir from the viewpoint of a quilt – a sort of Sisterhood of the Traveling Fabric Squares if you will.
Dear Literary agent,
Enclosed please find my thrilling novel about a teen-aged girl who can’t get along with her mother.
Dear Agent
This novel has something for everyone.
Lynnewriter, Absolutely. The “someting for everyone” tactic doesn’t resonate well with agents/editors.
Dear Agent
I think you’re a wonderful wonderful wonderful agent. Will you please please please be my agent.
I’m a lonely old nonfiction epilogued lady, so if you’re an older “seeking” linguistic agent, email me. Perhaps we could create something beautiful together.
Thank you! We hope so too. 🙂
Dear Editor:
If you help me sell this manuscript, I can feed my cat. He is a good cat; I am sure you would like him.
Budding Cat Lady
Author of My Hungry Cat Needs Your Support
Oh Wise One:
In our last incarnation, you published several of my books. Do not tempt Fate. Publish my work again.
Remember, Karma is/was a Bitch.
Your Once and Future Author
Phoenix Author
Dear Agent Swift
I am sure I have said something real exciting in my manuscript; but I’d be damned if I can find it. Do you think you could help?
Dear Agent,
Your wife is shackled in my basement and I own three horny Rottweilers.
Do the right thing-sell my book.
Lots lof love
Koo Lomax
Is it acceptable to mention a publishing contract that didn’t work out?
Only if something happened like the publisher suddenly closed, or the agent became ill and suddenly retired – things that would have no reflection on the quality of the book. Otherwise, we wouldn’t recommend it because it might seem like the book was ultimately considered not worth publishing.